Jokes For Laughing

A Chinese walks into a bar in America late one night and he saw Steven Spielberg.
As he was a great fan of his movies, he rushes over to him, and asks for his autograph.
Instead, Spielberg gives him a slap and says, "You Chinese people bombed our Pearl Habour, get outta here."
The astonished Chinese man replied, "It wa......s not the Chinese who bombed your PearlHarbour, it was the Japanese".
"Chinese, Japanese, Taiwanese, you're all the same," replied Spielberg.
In return, the Chinese gives Spielberg a slap and says, "You sank the Titanic, my forefathers were on that ship."
Shocked, Spielberg replies, "It was the iceberg that sank the ship, not me."
The Chinese replies, "Iceberg, Spielberg, Carlsberg, you're all the same."

Best Motovation Ever

Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

War does not determine who is right - only who is left.

To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.

1 match stck can burn the forest, but it takes a 100 mtch sticks 2 burn a camp fire

God must love stupid people. thats y He made SO many

Good girls are bad girls that never get caught

I intend to live forever. So far, so good.

I got in a fight one time with a really big guy, and he said, "I'm going to mop the floor with your face." I said, "You'll be sorry." He said, "Oh, yeah? Why?" I said, "Well, you won't be able to get into the corners very well."

If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you

Whoever coined the phrase "Quiet as a mouse" has never stepped on one.